take heart: part 1 - the parent trap
DISCLAIMER - If you are in a tough place and need someone to talk to please consider calling the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.
I know it can be a scary thing to pick up the phone and talk to a random stranger about what's going on. But believe me when I say that I used to work there and the NSPL line is staffed by some of the most caring, non-judgemental, loving people I've ever met.
So I recently helped teach a class to my church on working through depression and following Jesus at the same time. It was one of the coolest experiences of my recent life, I'd have to say. I absolutely loved being able to share information that I've had on my heart to share for quite some time. With that being said, it's a lot of information and I don't want to keep you here forever so let's jump in.
Depression - what is it? Good question. Tough question. There are many different ways depression can present, and there are many different conditions that have "depressed mood" as a symptom.
Something I want to emphasize is that we cannot diagnose each other or ourselves with "depression" just because we are experiencing depressed mood. That task is for trained, licensed professionals. There are all kinds of different reasons that someone may be experiencing depressed mood other than just having "depression" - and there are even different sub-types of "depression". It's complicated to figure out and it takes years of classes, training, practice, and supervision to be fully competent.
Most commonly, however, when people talk about "depression" they are referencing Major Depressive Disorder (MDD) - so that's what we're going to be talking about today. A lot of this information can be applied to other disorders, as you'll see, but for the sake of clarity and cogency we're going to stick to MDD.
What are the symptoms of MDD? Well.. they look different for each person. Most of the time "depressed mood" is a symptom, but not always. Some people feel sad, some people just feel flat like they have no feelings at all. Some people lose interest in activities they used to enjoy. Some people stop eating and lose weight while some people can't stop eating and gain weight. Some people feel worthless and/or incredibly guilty. Some people sleep all the time while others can't sleep at all. Some people become physically slow - they walk, talk, and move around slower than they used to. Some people feel tired, some people can't concentrate, and some people think about killing themselves.
Listing off all of the symptoms can feel so clinical and hard to connect to so I encourage to watch the following video. It's one of the best representations of depression that I've seen. It's intense, but it's so worth it.
It's important to know that not all people experience depression in the same way. People of all different races, ethnicities, genders, sexual orientations, and other cultural groups experience and express depression in different ways. When you are interacting with someone that has depression it's important to understand their experience of depression and not just hear the word "depression" and fill in the blanks yourself.
For example, there's a documentary called The Mask You Live in that does a fantastic job talking about many different issues men experience in our society - one such being depression and not being allowed to express sadness and talk about pain openly. I'm including the trailer so you can get an idea of the message because there's no way I could do a better job explaining it than they do.
(I would love to get into this further so I am planning on doing a whole post dedicated to men, society, and Jesus. Stay tuned.)
So now we have a general, basic overview of depression. Great. But what does that have to do with Christianity?
A lot.
For a long time it's seemed like Christianity and mental health have lived in separate spheres. Did you know that psychologists, out of all PhD level academics, have the highest level of individuals who identify as atheist? Sigmund Freud, the father of psychology, was a devout atheist who wrote a book called The Future of an Illusion where he described Christianity as a "collective neuroses". But it isn't just psychology's fault. I personally have heard so many horror stories of the church ostracizing people with mental health conditions and giving people terrible advice - even discouraging seeking treatment.
It's as if the church and the mental health field are two divorced parents doing the best they can to raise their children while simultaneously talking trash on the other one and trying to prove that they're the better parent.
I think it's about time we had a parent trap.
Look at Elijah - he said "I have had enough, Lord. Take my life; I am no better than my ancestors.” (1 Kings 19:4-5)
Look at Job - he said "Terrors overwhelm me…my life ebbs away, days of suffering grip me. Night pierces my bones, my gnawing pains never rest." (Job 30:15-17)
Look at David - he said “Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.” (Psalm 42:11)
Now I'm not saying these men had depression - I don't know them personally and in no way could diagnose that. But I am saying that these men said things that I could picture someone with depression saying.
I know sometimes people can have a hard time seeing how what they're going through - especially depression - is represented in the Bible or if God even understands. I bring up these men to illustrate that he does. The Bible can be such a resource for validation and connection - if we let it be. Depression and God, mental health and Jesus, scripture and research - these things don't have to live in separate worlds. They come together in such a beautiful way. We just have to be open to see it.
You know what else is beautiful? Elijah, Job, David - these men were all incredibly blessed by God. Elijah was the only human even to just be sucked up into heaven. He never had to go through an earthly death, he just ascended. Through Job's trials he lost his wealth and God blessed him by giving him twice as much as he had before. And David - David is described as being "a man after God's own heart". David is our example of how to love and connect to God. These men all suffered immensely and all were blessed beyond compare.
So we understand depression, and we know how mental health and the Bible can be a resource for each other. The last things I want to cover are practicals and recommendations. But this post has gone on for some time so we will talk about those soon in part 2. I am going to try my best to have that together and posted before the week is up! But until then...
I'll see you soon.